It's important to remember to slow down. Today, while walking to my car, on the same street I've walked down for three months now, I noticed a large orange apartment complex. How had I never noticed this before? It was beautiful, well kept, large, and on the corner. All of the times I passed this corner, I never noticed it? It was a reminder to slow down and take in my surroundings. How many times do we, as individuals, travel the same course, but never actually notice what's on along the path?
There was this woman that came into Starbucks today. I was doing something and looked up and said "WHOA! I Love your energy!" She smiled. Have you ever encountered someone that just as amazing, good energy and it kinds throws you off because it's so strong? Well, this girl today had it. I then responded with "you have such goof energy!" She responded with "You have really white teeth! and a great smile!" ha. I absolutely love, love, love encountering people with amazing energies. She kind of reminded me of my friend, Denita's energy. It's positive, warm, strong, and crazy. Amazingness rolled into one.
Tonight, I had a "Me" night. This entailed me grabbing Thai food. I came home. Threw on some of my meditation music. Meditated. Lit some incense. Had some wine. And talked to a good friend. This is the most relaxed I've felt in weeks. I've had a trying past week; however, we need to remember in those hard times to stay strong and be true to ourselves. I've cleansed myself of the negative and the hurt. I think it's important to do these things - to just relax in this fashion; to meditate. It clears the mind, it takes you away from the world and all of the insanity. It brings you closer to you. I have good things in my future, I just need to keep sending out that positivity.
I'm re-reading The Alchemist...for the 6th time? "When a person is in pursuit of his personal legend, all the world conspires to help this person accomplish his dream." I don't find it crazy or even weird that I have read this book so many times. I love it. I find so many different things in it each time. However, when I tell people that I've read this book so many times, they think it's crazy...or weird. Let them. I do what I do; they do what they do. I am on a quest for my own personal legend, also.
My note to you for the evening - sit. close your eyes. breathe in good energy. exhale the bad. allow your thoughts to wander. to drift. allow your mind to clear. allow yourself to listen to your own heart. to be at one with the soul of the world.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Friday, January 28, 2011
Life...
One year ago today Kyna's life was cut short. She was a beautiful soul who touched so many lives. Today, Kyle Holton's life was cut short. He had one of the biggest hearts and enjoyed making people laugh and smile.
I talk of living life in so many of these blogs. I talk of taking in your surroundings, of appreciating the people you have in your life, of having a positive outlook, of sending out good energy, of flashing a smile, of laughing, of coffee talks and socializing and friends. I talk of a life that is worth living, a life that is lived, a life that has soul; a soul that gets touched by others, that touches other lives, that breathes in the air, the energy, the world, the sky, the ocean. I talk of life. Living each moment.
Tell the people you love, you love them.
Flash a smile to a stranger.
Tell someone just how much you appreciate them.
Start that diet today, so that you may continue to live tomorrow to see your children or grandchildren.
Pursue your dreams with vivacity and courage.
Take the time to appreciate the little things.
Remember to breathe.
Live every day to its fullest because you never know when it just may be your last...
Rest in Peace, Kyle. You have touched a great number of lives and you will never be forgotten.
I talk of living life in so many of these blogs. I talk of taking in your surroundings, of appreciating the people you have in your life, of having a positive outlook, of sending out good energy, of flashing a smile, of laughing, of coffee talks and socializing and friends. I talk of a life that is worth living, a life that is lived, a life that has soul; a soul that gets touched by others, that touches other lives, that breathes in the air, the energy, the world, the sky, the ocean. I talk of life. Living each moment.
Tell the people you love, you love them.
Flash a smile to a stranger.
Tell someone just how much you appreciate them.
Start that diet today, so that you may continue to live tomorrow to see your children or grandchildren.
Pursue your dreams with vivacity and courage.
Take the time to appreciate the little things.
Remember to breathe.
Live every day to its fullest because you never know when it just may be your last...
Rest in Peace, Kyle. You have touched a great number of lives and you will never be forgotten.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Living each moment...
Yesterday, I met up with Melissa and we walked along the beach and then grabbed a margarita. (Apparently, margaritas on a Sunday afternoon are becoming our regular thing.) It was such an amazing way to end the week...or start the new one...however you'd like to look at it. Relaxing. Carefree. Fun. And in good company. What's fascinating about this new friendship is that I have known Melissa since I went to Western...so, what, 7 years? I've hung out with her on a number of occasions, but we've never delved deep into conversations. What is amazing, is how much we have in common, with everything. It's so rare to find someone who you can talk with about anything and everything, speculations, ideas, the current moment, whatever it is; the people you can sit with for hours on end. It is sooooo nice. This is what I LOVED about my friends in NYC; if you went out for a drink, you'd be there for hours...with the same drink...because you were so into the conversation. This is one of my favorite things to do - grab a drink with a good friend, and just talk, but not talking for talking's sake, but really, really talking about life, and everything else. Being able to breathe in the moment and allow your thoughts and feelings to flow is such a wonderful feeling.
I woke up today and felt good. Really good. I went on my computer. I saw that the nominations for the Oscars are coming out tomorrow. I saw a review on the film I was an extra on this summer that opened at Sundance. I smiled. I smiled so big. I felt an energy surge through me that I haven't felt in a while. A wonderful, exciting, thrilling energy; one that said "you're in the right place." It said that I am "on my way." This may sound weird to you and maybe some people, but I really really listen to myself, to my heart, to the earth, to God, to everything. In the book "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coehlo (which I have referenced before), he talks of the boy speaking to the soul of the world and speaking the language of the world. Everyone is capable of speaking the language of the world. This happens when you see someone and understand their emotions, understand their feelings, and the other person doesn't have to say a word. By being one with yourself, and really centered within your own body, you are able to listen to the soul of the world, and in turn listen to your heart. It speaks. It guides you. You just have to stop and allow yourself to listen. To live in the moment.
Yesterday, I had a beautiful day of just walking, listening to the waves crashing on the shore, allowing the sun to beat down on my face and arms, feeling the sand and the water underneath my feet and between my toes, and I breathed in that salty and fresh air. The thing about this, is I allowed myself to really live in these moments. I took it all in. I smelled, I felt, I listened, I touched; I took it all in. So many times we forget to just take in everything around us and really live in the moment. You never know what you may be missing if you tune out everything around you.
On that note, I'm going to leave you with a story that a friend of mine put on her facebook page. I, in turn, put it on mine. I apologize if you have already read it, but I feel it's one of those stories that deserves to be read again anyway. It's relevant and eye opening.
I woke up today and felt good. Really good. I went on my computer. I saw that the nominations for the Oscars are coming out tomorrow. I saw a review on the film I was an extra on this summer that opened at Sundance. I smiled. I smiled so big. I felt an energy surge through me that I haven't felt in a while. A wonderful, exciting, thrilling energy; one that said "you're in the right place." It said that I am "on my way." This may sound weird to you and maybe some people, but I really really listen to myself, to my heart, to the earth, to God, to everything. In the book "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coehlo (which I have referenced before), he talks of the boy speaking to the soul of the world and speaking the language of the world. Everyone is capable of speaking the language of the world. This happens when you see someone and understand their emotions, understand their feelings, and the other person doesn't have to say a word. By being one with yourself, and really centered within your own body, you are able to listen to the soul of the world, and in turn listen to your heart. It speaks. It guides you. You just have to stop and allow yourself to listen. To live in the moment.
Yesterday, I had a beautiful day of just walking, listening to the waves crashing on the shore, allowing the sun to beat down on my face and arms, feeling the sand and the water underneath my feet and between my toes, and I breathed in that salty and fresh air. The thing about this, is I allowed myself to really live in these moments. I took it all in. I smelled, I felt, I listened, I touched; I took it all in. So many times we forget to just take in everything around us and really live in the moment. You never know what you may be missing if you tune out everything around you.
On that note, I'm going to leave you with a story that a friend of mine put on her facebook page. I, in turn, put it on mine. I apologize if you have already read it, but I feel it's one of those stories that deserves to be read again anyway. It's relevant and eye opening.
THE SITUATION
In Washington , DC , at a Metro Station, on a cold January morning in 2007, this man with a violin played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, approximately 2,000 people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. After about 3 minutes, a middle-aged man noticed that there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds, and then he hurried on to meet his schedule.
About 4 minutes later:
The violinist received his first dollar. A woman threw money in the hat and, without stopping, continued to walk.
At 6 minutes:
A young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started to walk again.
At 10 minutes:
A 3-year old boy stopped, but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped to look at the violinist again, but the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head the whole time. This action wasrepeated by several other children, but every parent - without exception - forced their children to move on quickly.
At 45 minutes:
The musician played continuously. Only 6 people stopped and listened for a short while. About 20 gave money but continued to walk at their normal pace. The man collected a total of $32.
After 1 hour:
He finished playing and silence took over. No one noticed and no one applauded. There was no recognition at all.
No one knew this, but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million dollars. Two days before, Joshua Bell sold-out a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $100 each to sit and listen to him play the same music.
This is a true story. Joshua Bell, playing incognito in the D.C. Metro Station, was organized by the Washington Postas part of a social experiment about perception, taste and people's priorities.
This experiment raised several questions:
*In a common-place environment, at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty?
*If so, do we stop to appreciate it?
*Do we recognize talent in an unexpected context?
One possible conclusion reached from this experiment could be this:
If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world, playing some of the finest music ever written, with one of the most beautiful instruments ever made . . ..
How many other things are we missing as we rush through life?
Sunday, January 23, 2011
The people we meet
This week has been a week of people...of meeting new people, of being acquainted with old friends, of making new friends, and learning new things about people. Throughout all of this, I have had my moments of happiness, of frustration, of understanding, of misunderstanding, but most of all, of being in touch with my own emotions. My own vulnerability. It's funny that I say "vulnerability" because just yesterday, at the conclusion of the week of all of this stuff, I received a video in an e-mail from Valerie telling me I needed to watch it. It was a researcher who studied people and their connections. Through it, she realized that the people who were most vulnerable, who were most eager to admit their feelings, to make connections, were the ones that were most happy and ok with themselves...they were ok with their vulnerability. Most people hide it and attempt to lock it away and not allow themselves to feel feelings or emotions that are not fun to emote. Crazy, right?
This week was also a week of moves. I met up with Melissa and her friend Rachel on Sunday. Melissa is Jamie's best friend from high school, and I have hung out with her on many occasions throughout the past 8 years. She just moved here so I met up. It's amazing how you can meet up with someone that you don't know super well, but everything clicks. The three of us had an amazing afternoon of just talking, laughing, and relaxing. It was actually really, really nice. Sometimes, it can be so hard to find people who share the same beliefs in life as you and are really just about living every day. Sounds weird, but it's kind of rare. Their good energy resonated with mine and I'm really looking forward to this friendship with them in the future.
Alaina moved here earlier this week. Alaina and I were friends at Wayne State. We were in shows together at the Bonstelle, and also shared the same African Dance class. She is a great energy to be around and I can always count on laughing a lot with her. I haven't really talked to her in the past couple of years, but I'm really glad she reached out to me when she moved here. She's a great actress and an extremely driven individual. She's leaving some of her stuff at my place while she apt searches. Luckily for her, though, she was able to transfer to the Red Lobster here in LA. So, she has a job after only a few days. NICE. When you're meant to be somewhere, it works out.
I picked up Crystal from the airport on Wednesday; she's in town just for the weekend...leaving today actually. We spent the car ride catching up on things. It was so nice to be hanging out with her again. Thursday I met up with her and her friend, Jayson, at a restaurant for dinner and drinks. It was such a great time, and here's why. We talked about everything. Of successes, of trials, of tribulations, of obstacles, of breakthroughs. Jayson is also an actor, and is now currently a co-star on a tv show. However, it took him a bit to get there. I already knew Crystal's story, but Jayson told me his. It was so nice to have someone just open up about probably one of the hardest parts of his lives. It was nice to hear, and sort of reassuring...if you believe it, you can do it. A lot of times, it's luck, but most of it is your heart. He was discussing this acting class that he was taking with this brilliant woman, and it sounded so similar to the things we did at Studio 5 that I absolutely loved. It was all about developing and honing in more on the imagination to create the character and the environment. He's supposed to give me more info on it...and as soon as I have a little extra cash, I'm signing up. What's amazing about this, is that a lot of people, and even actors, look at this type of class and kind of shrug it off. What they don't realize is that you need to have an expansive imagination, as well as the ability to tap into it, to make your acting incredible. If you believe it, the audience will believe it. This is a group of actors that I have found that believe in the same things I do, love the idea of amazing acting and continuously shaping your craft, and the ideal of doing more than the best you can do. These are the type of people I need to surround myself around as actors, and I have. Such an amazing evening.
On the contrary to the previous paragraph, you'd find it remarkable how many people move out here to be actors because they're pretty or beautiful. What people don't realize is that acting isn't just something you jump into; it's an actual profession. There's a lot that is involved with it. Mind you, these people may be cast because of their looks, but will their careers still be around in 50 years? Who's to say? What I do know, is that you get out of it what you put into it, like I say about anything. Fame and fortune shouldn't be the reason you act...you should be doing it because it is the one thing that you cannot see yourself living without.
I received a text from Whitney yesterday saying that she and Marnie talked to the new marketing directors at The Hallmark to find a way to bring me back for the second performance of "Tuesdays at 4" in March. They're currently working it out. How amazing is that?! I almost started crying because of the generosity and pure love of this project that everyone has now, and the belief in it. I don't know if I had mentioned this before, but after our first performance, we got asked to do a performance at NYU's Rusk Institute. So, they're in preparation for this performance. Obviously, I would love to be there, but finances are kind of holding me back. However, now, I may be able to go. We will see, and time will tell. What an amazing journey this will be, though. At this same exact time, I received a facebook message from a friend saying he is going to be working with a company in a few months that works a lot with the major studios and will try to help me in any way he can. It's amazing how people want to reach out and help in any way they can...I guess with sending out good energy, you must get good energy back in return. I try not to emit negative energy or thoughts...I mean, all it does is get in the way of what you're doing, what other people are doing, and just make for a miserable time for all. Why not smile, and fill someone with joy or happiness...such a better way to live.
When I first moved to California, the self confidence I had built within myself was sort of waning. It was sort of pushed down and concealed. It took me a bit, but I'm now at a good place with my self confidence again. Not just in acting, but in anything. I believe in myself. I believe in the things that I say, the disagreements that I make, the choices I make. That's such a big thing and a huge part of what makes each of individuals. I also cannot take on other roles if I don't first understand who I am or believe in myself. If I don't believe in myself, how can I believe in someone else/a character? Exactly. I'm continuing on the right path and I'm extremely excited about it.
This week was also a week of moves. I met up with Melissa and her friend Rachel on Sunday. Melissa is Jamie's best friend from high school, and I have hung out with her on many occasions throughout the past 8 years. She just moved here so I met up. It's amazing how you can meet up with someone that you don't know super well, but everything clicks. The three of us had an amazing afternoon of just talking, laughing, and relaxing. It was actually really, really nice. Sometimes, it can be so hard to find people who share the same beliefs in life as you and are really just about living every day. Sounds weird, but it's kind of rare. Their good energy resonated with mine and I'm really looking forward to this friendship with them in the future.
Alaina moved here earlier this week. Alaina and I were friends at Wayne State. We were in shows together at the Bonstelle, and also shared the same African Dance class. She is a great energy to be around and I can always count on laughing a lot with her. I haven't really talked to her in the past couple of years, but I'm really glad she reached out to me when she moved here. She's a great actress and an extremely driven individual. She's leaving some of her stuff at my place while she apt searches. Luckily for her, though, she was able to transfer to the Red Lobster here in LA. So, she has a job after only a few days. NICE. When you're meant to be somewhere, it works out.
I picked up Crystal from the airport on Wednesday; she's in town just for the weekend...leaving today actually. We spent the car ride catching up on things. It was so nice to be hanging out with her again. Thursday I met up with her and her friend, Jayson, at a restaurant for dinner and drinks. It was such a great time, and here's why. We talked about everything. Of successes, of trials, of tribulations, of obstacles, of breakthroughs. Jayson is also an actor, and is now currently a co-star on a tv show. However, it took him a bit to get there. I already knew Crystal's story, but Jayson told me his. It was so nice to have someone just open up about probably one of the hardest parts of his lives. It was nice to hear, and sort of reassuring...if you believe it, you can do it. A lot of times, it's luck, but most of it is your heart. He was discussing this acting class that he was taking with this brilliant woman, and it sounded so similar to the things we did at Studio 5 that I absolutely loved. It was all about developing and honing in more on the imagination to create the character and the environment. He's supposed to give me more info on it...and as soon as I have a little extra cash, I'm signing up. What's amazing about this, is that a lot of people, and even actors, look at this type of class and kind of shrug it off. What they don't realize is that you need to have an expansive imagination, as well as the ability to tap into it, to make your acting incredible. If you believe it, the audience will believe it. This is a group of actors that I have found that believe in the same things I do, love the idea of amazing acting and continuously shaping your craft, and the ideal of doing more than the best you can do. These are the type of people I need to surround myself around as actors, and I have. Such an amazing evening.
On the contrary to the previous paragraph, you'd find it remarkable how many people move out here to be actors because they're pretty or beautiful. What people don't realize is that acting isn't just something you jump into; it's an actual profession. There's a lot that is involved with it. Mind you, these people may be cast because of their looks, but will their careers still be around in 50 years? Who's to say? What I do know, is that you get out of it what you put into it, like I say about anything. Fame and fortune shouldn't be the reason you act...you should be doing it because it is the one thing that you cannot see yourself living without.
I received a text from Whitney yesterday saying that she and Marnie talked to the new marketing directors at The Hallmark to find a way to bring me back for the second performance of "Tuesdays at 4" in March. They're currently working it out. How amazing is that?! I almost started crying because of the generosity and pure love of this project that everyone has now, and the belief in it. I don't know if I had mentioned this before, but after our first performance, we got asked to do a performance at NYU's Rusk Institute. So, they're in preparation for this performance. Obviously, I would love to be there, but finances are kind of holding me back. However, now, I may be able to go. We will see, and time will tell. What an amazing journey this will be, though. At this same exact time, I received a facebook message from a friend saying he is going to be working with a company in a few months that works a lot with the major studios and will try to help me in any way he can. It's amazing how people want to reach out and help in any way they can...I guess with sending out good energy, you must get good energy back in return. I try not to emit negative energy or thoughts...I mean, all it does is get in the way of what you're doing, what other people are doing, and just make for a miserable time for all. Why not smile, and fill someone with joy or happiness...such a better way to live.
When I first moved to California, the self confidence I had built within myself was sort of waning. It was sort of pushed down and concealed. It took me a bit, but I'm now at a good place with my self confidence again. Not just in acting, but in anything. I believe in myself. I believe in the things that I say, the disagreements that I make, the choices I make. That's such a big thing and a huge part of what makes each of individuals. I also cannot take on other roles if I don't first understand who I am or believe in myself. If I don't believe in myself, how can I believe in someone else/a character? Exactly. I'm continuing on the right path and I'm extremely excited about it.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Another Opening, Another Day
It's hard to believe that my first LA Opening Night has already come and gone...but what a great opening it was. The house was packed with an eager and excited audience. Throughout the play, you could feel how engaged the audience was - their silence, their laughter, their undivided attention. It was like a mutual hunger between audience and actor that was now being fed. Then, as quickly as it started, the show came to an end, with loud applause and cheers.
After the show, people came up to me to tell me I did really great work, etc. What was different about this than what has happened before after shows, is that the audience members sought me out. Yes, they weaved through the crowd of theatre goers, to come up to me and tell me just how much they enjoyed performance. Then, recounting memorable moments for them and moments that made them laugh. I was actually thanked by one person for bringing those characters to life on stage. Someone else told me that the energy I brought to the stage made it a joy to watch and that my stage presence was amazing. I'm not even going to pretend to lie, I was blown away by the audience response to my performance. I knew everyone would love the show because it's amazing, but I've never made this kind of an impact before. It's a really, truly great feeling - especially because this was the most challenging show I've been in (as stated before), and I am most proud of the work I've put into it. It was an excellent opening night, and I am thrilled and excited to see what the next 5 shows bring.
It's really amazing how you may feel one way about a certain thing about yourself, but everyone else feels another. It took me a long time to actually get comfortable with being an actor. I knew that I had the talent. I knew that I had the drive. However, I did not have the most important key - confidence. If an actor does not have confidence in himself, then he will not succeed to his fullest potential. His doubts will shine through through his conversations, his auditions, his acting; it will be like a beacon of light saying "believe in me, but I don't really believe in myself." It doesn't work that way. Living in New York, studying at Studio 5, being in the shows that I was in there, establishing myself as an individual, have all helped me gain confidence in myself, my acting, my abilities, and my life, in general. Since that has happened, I don't have the same reactions I used to have in college after shows by some people - the "congratulations" in a mock smile, or the avoidance of eye contact so as not to have to tell you the truth. I wish I could go back and instill the old me with what I have now...but, it's all a learning experience, right? You're supposed to grow. You're supposed to deal with the bad to get to the good. I mean, if I wasn't meant to be doing this craft, then I wouldn't be consistently moving forward with it. That alone should say something.
Yesterday was the perfect lazy day...the perfect day to have a bbq and a beer on a patio with some friends...I worked, though, so that didn't happen. However, I did enjoy the sun at the beginning of the day. Today, I don't work until this evening, so after this blog entry, I'll be showering and then heading down to the beach for the day. Why not? It's supposed to be 79 and sunny. 79 and sunny in January? Yes, please. For everyone that thought that California would not be right for me...you could not have been more wrong in so many ways. I have only been here for two and a half months, and I already feel like I'm not new. Yes, there are a lot of things I still don't know, but I feel like I fit in here so much faster and so much easier that New York. I made my way there, yes, by scratching and clawing every step of the way. I'm not saying I'm not doing that here either, but it's as if I am swimming downstream with the current...I'm in the right place doing what I am supposed to be doing working at the place I'm supposed to be working at....all at the right time. It's a beautiful thing when you listen to your instincts and then you feel at one and at home with the results.
After the show, people came up to me to tell me I did really great work, etc. What was different about this than what has happened before after shows, is that the audience members sought me out. Yes, they weaved through the crowd of theatre goers, to come up to me and tell me just how much they enjoyed performance. Then, recounting memorable moments for them and moments that made them laugh. I was actually thanked by one person for bringing those characters to life on stage. Someone else told me that the energy I brought to the stage made it a joy to watch and that my stage presence was amazing. I'm not even going to pretend to lie, I was blown away by the audience response to my performance. I knew everyone would love the show because it's amazing, but I've never made this kind of an impact before. It's a really, truly great feeling - especially because this was the most challenging show I've been in (as stated before), and I am most proud of the work I've put into it. It was an excellent opening night, and I am thrilled and excited to see what the next 5 shows bring.
It's really amazing how you may feel one way about a certain thing about yourself, but everyone else feels another. It took me a long time to actually get comfortable with being an actor. I knew that I had the talent. I knew that I had the drive. However, I did not have the most important key - confidence. If an actor does not have confidence in himself, then he will not succeed to his fullest potential. His doubts will shine through through his conversations, his auditions, his acting; it will be like a beacon of light saying "believe in me, but I don't really believe in myself." It doesn't work that way. Living in New York, studying at Studio 5, being in the shows that I was in there, establishing myself as an individual, have all helped me gain confidence in myself, my acting, my abilities, and my life, in general. Since that has happened, I don't have the same reactions I used to have in college after shows by some people - the "congratulations" in a mock smile, or the avoidance of eye contact so as not to have to tell you the truth. I wish I could go back and instill the old me with what I have now...but, it's all a learning experience, right? You're supposed to grow. You're supposed to deal with the bad to get to the good. I mean, if I wasn't meant to be doing this craft, then I wouldn't be consistently moving forward with it. That alone should say something.
Yesterday was the perfect lazy day...the perfect day to have a bbq and a beer on a patio with some friends...I worked, though, so that didn't happen. However, I did enjoy the sun at the beginning of the day. Today, I don't work until this evening, so after this blog entry, I'll be showering and then heading down to the beach for the day. Why not? It's supposed to be 79 and sunny. 79 and sunny in January? Yes, please. For everyone that thought that California would not be right for me...you could not have been more wrong in so many ways. I have only been here for two and a half months, and I already feel like I'm not new. Yes, there are a lot of things I still don't know, but I feel like I fit in here so much faster and so much easier that New York. I made my way there, yes, by scratching and clawing every step of the way. I'm not saying I'm not doing that here either, but it's as if I am swimming downstream with the current...I'm in the right place doing what I am supposed to be doing working at the place I'm supposed to be working at....all at the right time. It's a beautiful thing when you listen to your instincts and then you feel at one and at home with the results.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
A Phantom and a Song
"Shudder" opens on Friday at Zombie Joe's Underground Theatre in the NoHo Arts District, and I could not be more excited to be in my first play here in LA. It has been an amazing experience on so many levels. I keep thinking back to my audition...the director, Amy, asked me if knew anything about the theatre and why I wanted to be cast in the show. I said that I knew the theatre put on thrilling shows that always pushed the envelope. I wanted to be in the show because it was different from anything I have ever done before, and it would be a challenge, but I love challenges. I love being presented with an opportunity to grasp a challenge, to finally overcome it, and then build even more from there. I can proudly say that I have done just that with this play throughout the rehearsal process. I have taken on characters that are gnarly, grunting, miserable, and evil. I have taken on characters with a physicality that makes you uncomfortable because my body shouldn't be moving in that fashion. I have grasped the ability to be as crazy and energetic as the Mad Hatter and in a moment's time change over to possess the rage and pure hatred of the devil. What I am also most proud of, is my ability to control my entire body with each character...each movement of a finger, every step I take, every breath I breathe, has a purpose, a form, a specific intention, and my character owns it. Remember back to when I was talking about working as an extra on the set of Demi Moore's "The Reasonable Bunch." Remember how I spoke of her and Ellen Barkin's innate ability to command the space with every fiber of their being? They owned the roles they were playing and it showed? I feel that now. I know what it looks like and how powerful it is because of those two actresses, and now I know what it feels like in my own body when I am in power like that. The result? A compelling, intriguing, and unique character. I think this play is showcasing some of the best work I have ever done, and I am most proud of what I have put into this show. On another note, as you know that I love movement pieces, one was added in...and I am the mover. I enter the stage as a phantom, sort of jester-ish, and I "possess" the boy. Essentially, I move and he mirrors every move I make. It's sooooo cool looking and feeling. To be able to take on a mute character with this sort of ability, and convey emotions through movement, is remarkable and amazing. I am extremely grateful that Amy has given me the opportunity to be a part of this new production. It's a great feeling to literally feel how I am growing as an actor with each project I am taking on, with each character I get to tackle. From the time I left Studio 5 to now, it has been an uphill climb with obstacles and challenges, which resulted in triumphs and successes. I am truly excited to see what else the future has in store because I am ready, my confidence is there, I know I have the talent and drive, and I know I can tackle anything.
It is amazing how a genuine "How are you" or compliment can really go a long way. When customers come up to the register at Starbucks, I generally ask "How are you doing?" or "How is your day going?" and I am completely and utterly genuine about it...and they can tell that I am also genuinely listening for a response. So many times those questions are thrown around and people forget their meaning. The questions are actual questions. I don't ask it if I don't feel like hearing a response. If they're having a bad day, I always hope that my upbeat personality, smile, and "witty" remarks will at least help them smile for those few moments. A smile can really help take your mind off of everything else, even for a moment, and fill you with a happy emotion. I've seen it happen. People have thanked me and my co-workers for "making them smile" or laugh, and then went on their way. That's what life is about...making a difference...even for a moment. Yes, it may not mean much, but that person may have just gotten yelled at by their boss, lost their dog, forget their wallet at home, just gotten broken up with, or whatever the case may be, and to be able to go somewhere where the workers just want to make you smile and happy? That's a pretty great thing.
I was leaving work the other day and there was an overabundance of pastries. I asked if I could have some instead of having them being thrown out at the end of the day; I figured I could take them to rehearsal. Actors are always hungry. I left work with two little bags of pastries. I was walking home and I passed a homeless man. Without even thinking, I walked up to him and gave him one of my bags, and went on my way. It hit me afterward what I had done impulsively. It's amazing how sometimes the heart acts before your head even gets the opportunity to assess the situation. I would have given him a bag anyway had it crossed my mind, but it didn't...my heart spoke first.
Be genuine. Be real. Be you. Speak with your heart.
It is amazing how a genuine "How are you" or compliment can really go a long way. When customers come up to the register at Starbucks, I generally ask "How are you doing?" or "How is your day going?" and I am completely and utterly genuine about it...and they can tell that I am also genuinely listening for a response. So many times those questions are thrown around and people forget their meaning. The questions are actual questions. I don't ask it if I don't feel like hearing a response. If they're having a bad day, I always hope that my upbeat personality, smile, and "witty" remarks will at least help them smile for those few moments. A smile can really help take your mind off of everything else, even for a moment, and fill you with a happy emotion. I've seen it happen. People have thanked me and my co-workers for "making them smile" or laugh, and then went on their way. That's what life is about...making a difference...even for a moment. Yes, it may not mean much, but that person may have just gotten yelled at by their boss, lost their dog, forget their wallet at home, just gotten broken up with, or whatever the case may be, and to be able to go somewhere where the workers just want to make you smile and happy? That's a pretty great thing.
I was leaving work the other day and there was an overabundance of pastries. I asked if I could have some instead of having them being thrown out at the end of the day; I figured I could take them to rehearsal. Actors are always hungry. I left work with two little bags of pastries. I was walking home and I passed a homeless man. Without even thinking, I walked up to him and gave him one of my bags, and went on my way. It hit me afterward what I had done impulsively. It's amazing how sometimes the heart acts before your head even gets the opportunity to assess the situation. I would have given him a bag anyway had it crossed my mind, but it didn't...my heart spoke first.
Be genuine. Be real. Be you. Speak with your heart.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
I get by with a little help from my friends...
I would like to start off with a story that happened yesterday that goes along with yesterday's entry:
So, I'm at work and this woman comes up to the register and already gives me attitude...for whatever reason. She wants a green tea. I ask what size. "Tall! and NOT large! That's what you guys gave me last time and that's NOT what I wanted." I help up the tall cup I had grabbed. "Yes, that's fine." ok.... I ask which green tea...she give me a blank stare like I'm stupid and I just spoke a different language. I proceed to describe them. "THE BOLD ONE!" ok. No need to get excited or angry? (what?!) After I give her her tea, she gave me a gift card. Balance is zero. She gives me another. Balance is zero. She searches for another. The unsettling awareness of everyone around her staring at her and her awkwardness for the moment begins to creep in. She finds one dollar. She needs ninety five cents more. Her hands begin to shake. She is now searching even harder for one more dollar. I keep my gaze and my pleasant smile. When she finally extracts that last dollar, that overconfidence and rudeness that came with her glare before were now replaced with a vulnerability and almost friendliness? Now, this makes me wonder...what in the world has happened to this woman to make her feel like she has to treat everyone else around her condescendingly and rudely? The thing is...she's not the only one. So many people put up this wall, this shield, in order to deflect everything that comes at them from the outside world. The problem with some of these people? They don't know how to use the shield and still have a nice demeanor. They have to treat the world coldly...until karma hits them and they are brought back down to earth. I just wanted to share this story with you because of...well, you get the picture. I do agree that we should wear a shield, a protective layer when outside, because there is so much nasty energy, but at the same time, we need to stay true to ourselves and not let it get in the way of genuine and nice human interaction.
January is a month of moves...I have three friends moving to LA from Michigan. Two from Wayne State and one is a best friend of a best friend. I've extended my hand to them and told them to never hesitate to ask for help, call if they have questions, or shoot me a text if they want to just grab a coffee. Big cities can be lonely places...especially for first timers. It's good and comforting to know that you have someone there...that is not only there for you, but that they actually mean it. I then began to think about my amazing friends here. Both Julie and Crystal had offered their places to me to stay at if I didn't have a place when I first moved here...before I even asked. They understand. They know. It's hard. Luckily, I had a place, so it worked out, but just having that knowledge was so comforting. It was nice to know that I had people in my new city that were there for me in every facet and way. I hope I am the same for my friends. In sort of the same respect, it's amazing how certain people are brought into your life...and remain in your life...or even leave and come back when you're both on the same page. Life is funny like that, but cool just the same. It's fascinating that I ended up at this Starbucks because I have become friends with everyone that works there. They're so fun and make the day go by so fast. Yes, we're working, but at the same time, it doesn't always feel like work; it feels more like a gathering place for like personalities to just have fun...and in the meantime, we have obligations...like making drinks and ringing people up. :) It's nice to have that feeling. I'm guessing that's why this Starbucks is one of the most successful ones in the area. Since we have that camaraderie, the customers are going to feel more at home and enjoy coming in. If we're laughing and smiling genuinely, it's only going to be contagious...and boy, is it ever. Jokes, laughs, and smiles are always abound.
Have you ever just sat down and really listened to you heart? I mean, really listened? Were you ever caught off guard by what it said? Or were you comforted? Stressed? Or moved? I've sat down and listened to mine on many occasions and it's always the same thing...something big. Whatever that means. I'm going to be doing something big. I will be making a difference somehow, doing something...eventually. I'm intrigued and thrilled and excited for the road ahead. I also know (on a different note) that whatever I have in store before that, all of my talents will be used...singing, dancing, and acting. I sincerely feel that, too. it's comforting to know, but scary at the same time. But, I just have to let the fear subside and have faith.
Well, today I'm meeting up with Julie to go for a hike. It's so beautiful and refreshing to be standing up on a mountain and looking out over the city and seeing the Pacific Ocean in the distance. A breath of fresh air, if you will...literally and figuratively. Go find your breath of fresh air and remember to live in the moment and grasp every second.
So, I'm at work and this woman comes up to the register and already gives me attitude...for whatever reason. She wants a green tea. I ask what size. "Tall! and NOT large! That's what you guys gave me last time and that's NOT what I wanted." I help up the tall cup I had grabbed. "Yes, that's fine." ok.... I ask which green tea...she give me a blank stare like I'm stupid and I just spoke a different language. I proceed to describe them. "THE BOLD ONE!" ok. No need to get excited or angry? (what?!) After I give her her tea, she gave me a gift card. Balance is zero. She gives me another. Balance is zero. She searches for another. The unsettling awareness of everyone around her staring at her and her awkwardness for the moment begins to creep in. She finds one dollar. She needs ninety five cents more. Her hands begin to shake. She is now searching even harder for one more dollar. I keep my gaze and my pleasant smile. When she finally extracts that last dollar, that overconfidence and rudeness that came with her glare before were now replaced with a vulnerability and almost friendliness? Now, this makes me wonder...what in the world has happened to this woman to make her feel like she has to treat everyone else around her condescendingly and rudely? The thing is...she's not the only one. So many people put up this wall, this shield, in order to deflect everything that comes at them from the outside world. The problem with some of these people? They don't know how to use the shield and still have a nice demeanor. They have to treat the world coldly...until karma hits them and they are brought back down to earth. I just wanted to share this story with you because of...well, you get the picture. I do agree that we should wear a shield, a protective layer when outside, because there is so much nasty energy, but at the same time, we need to stay true to ourselves and not let it get in the way of genuine and nice human interaction.
January is a month of moves...I have three friends moving to LA from Michigan. Two from Wayne State and one is a best friend of a best friend. I've extended my hand to them and told them to never hesitate to ask for help, call if they have questions, or shoot me a text if they want to just grab a coffee. Big cities can be lonely places...especially for first timers. It's good and comforting to know that you have someone there...that is not only there for you, but that they actually mean it. I then began to think about my amazing friends here. Both Julie and Crystal had offered their places to me to stay at if I didn't have a place when I first moved here...before I even asked. They understand. They know. It's hard. Luckily, I had a place, so it worked out, but just having that knowledge was so comforting. It was nice to know that I had people in my new city that were there for me in every facet and way. I hope I am the same for my friends. In sort of the same respect, it's amazing how certain people are brought into your life...and remain in your life...or even leave and come back when you're both on the same page. Life is funny like that, but cool just the same. It's fascinating that I ended up at this Starbucks because I have become friends with everyone that works there. They're so fun and make the day go by so fast. Yes, we're working, but at the same time, it doesn't always feel like work; it feels more like a gathering place for like personalities to just have fun...and in the meantime, we have obligations...like making drinks and ringing people up. :) It's nice to have that feeling. I'm guessing that's why this Starbucks is one of the most successful ones in the area. Since we have that camaraderie, the customers are going to feel more at home and enjoy coming in. If we're laughing and smiling genuinely, it's only going to be contagious...and boy, is it ever. Jokes, laughs, and smiles are always abound.
Have you ever just sat down and really listened to you heart? I mean, really listened? Were you ever caught off guard by what it said? Or were you comforted? Stressed? Or moved? I've sat down and listened to mine on many occasions and it's always the same thing...something big. Whatever that means. I'm going to be doing something big. I will be making a difference somehow, doing something...eventually. I'm intrigued and thrilled and excited for the road ahead. I also know (on a different note) that whatever I have in store before that, all of my talents will be used...singing, dancing, and acting. I sincerely feel that, too. it's comforting to know, but scary at the same time. But, I just have to let the fear subside and have faith.
Well, today I'm meeting up with Julie to go for a hike. It's so beautiful and refreshing to be standing up on a mountain and looking out over the city and seeing the Pacific Ocean in the distance. A breath of fresh air, if you will...literally and figuratively. Go find your breath of fresh air and remember to live in the moment and grasp every second.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Live the Music
I find it absolutely compelling and intriguing that when you are in a certain mood, a song that correlates with that mood may pop up on the radio or your ipod. Let's not even use mood - let's say you need motivation, you're down on yourself, you're overly elated, you've reached a pivotal moment; whatever the occasion, the playlist that ensues directly correlates with what you are feeling. Have you ever noticed that happening? The time when you are the most hard on yourself, that one song that has always inspired you randomly pops on. My question: is this mere coincidence or is this fate? Or is this some type of power that we possess in ourselves to send out a certain type of energy and in return, we receive what we need? I wish I could be more articulate on that, but I'm not fully sure how to be quite yet. However, I do truly feel that if we send a certain energy out into the universe, what we receive in return is a direct response to that. If you send out positive energy, wishful thinking, a belief on something, I truly believe that you will get those things in return. Obviously you'll still have your life lessons and obstacles, that's inevitable, and only makes you a stronger individual in the end. In conjunction with this, I also believe that the negative energy you send out, along with the "this will never work out" or "I can't do that" attitude also will be given to you in return. So, why not just send out positive thoughts, right? Besides, they're healthier for you and the world in the long run. :) Anyway...the whole reason I brought this all up is because yesterday morning I made myself a playlist on my ipod to walk to work to. I knew the songs were songs I wanted to listen to. However, once I began walking, I realized that they had a stronger meaning in a. not only the order they were played, but b. the context. They directly related to me at that given moment and gave me exactly what I needed to put the pep in my step. Perfectly perfect. Now, onto the second part of this paragraph - Throughout the day, I began dealing with people who were just being rude and selfish for absolutely no reason, for their own conceited reasons or what not. Hey, your prerogative. However, as I said before, when the time comes, karma can be cruel...real cruel. Why live every day being rude to random strangers who are actually flashing you a smile and genuinely asking how you are doing? People who respond negatively? I sort of feel bad for whatever reason they happen to be miserable for. Hopefully, they will find happiness at some point.
Last night the cast met up at the Director's apt and we had a "sewing party." Since the show has no budget, we have to provide our own costumes. So, to make things a little more fun, we decided to have a night where we get together, have some snacks, some drinks, and put together (or rip apart) our costumes for the show. There's something thrilling about ripping apart (and I mean ripping apart) a perfectly good article of clothing and making it beautiful in a whole different sense of the word. For one of my characters, I play a Wagoneer, a gravedigger of sorts. I had a really nice beige trenchcoat...and then I took the scissors to it. And then I began tearing it with my hands. Then i threw it in the dirt, stomped on it, swished it around, got the dirt embedded. Now, I have this really nice trenchcoat...really nice in a different sense. However, it is perfect for the character, and for me to wear as the character. Believe it or not, to rip and tear something to perfection for you to use like this also uses a lot of creativity so as not to do too much or too little. You're taking something apart (although it may seem like it), you are actually putting something together. Huh. Think about that one...Constructing by deconstructing. Fascinating.
On that note, it is time for me to get ready for the day and serve up coffee and lattes with a smile. How would you feel if the person ringing you up at the register was super friendly? Or the person handing you your latte gave you a little song with it? Sometimes, my customers get that type of service. A little smile, a little dance, a little song, but all in all, a really good drink (not to toot my own horn or anything). But, I'm not the only one who does that...almost all of the employees do that here, too. How did I ever find/get hired at a Starbucks that has good energy, laughs a lot, and enjoys their life. LOVE IT. Enjoy your day and remember to smile and laugh. :)
Last night the cast met up at the Director's apt and we had a "sewing party." Since the show has no budget, we have to provide our own costumes. So, to make things a little more fun, we decided to have a night where we get together, have some snacks, some drinks, and put together (or rip apart) our costumes for the show. There's something thrilling about ripping apart (and I mean ripping apart) a perfectly good article of clothing and making it beautiful in a whole different sense of the word. For one of my characters, I play a Wagoneer, a gravedigger of sorts. I had a really nice beige trenchcoat...and then I took the scissors to it. And then I began tearing it with my hands. Then i threw it in the dirt, stomped on it, swished it around, got the dirt embedded. Now, I have this really nice trenchcoat...really nice in a different sense. However, it is perfect for the character, and for me to wear as the character. Believe it or not, to rip and tear something to perfection for you to use like this also uses a lot of creativity so as not to do too much or too little. You're taking something apart (although it may seem like it), you are actually putting something together. Huh. Think about that one...Constructing by deconstructing. Fascinating.
On that note, it is time for me to get ready for the day and serve up coffee and lattes with a smile. How would you feel if the person ringing you up at the register was super friendly? Or the person handing you your latte gave you a little song with it? Sometimes, my customers get that type of service. A little smile, a little dance, a little song, but all in all, a really good drink (not to toot my own horn or anything). But, I'm not the only one who does that...almost all of the employees do that here, too. How did I ever find/get hired at a Starbucks that has good energy, laughs a lot, and enjoys their life. LOVE IT. Enjoy your day and remember to smile and laugh. :)
Sunday, January 2, 2011
2011
The question I keep seeing on facebook/receiving from people is "How was 2010 for you? Was it a good year? Was it a bad year?" I don't know if I can simply label a whole 365 days worth of time, a whole 8760 hours, 525, 600 minutes, or 31,536,000 seconds worth of time into either a category labeled "good" or "bad." That's too generic, simplistic, and downright lame. It was a year of change, a transitional year. It had it's amazing moments, it had it's devastating moments, but all in all, a year of growth, learning, and expansion. So, yes it was a good year, and yes, it was a bad year, but most of all, I lived through the year. I didn't merely exist; I lived. I took what life had to offer, made the best of it, and continued to still delve deeper into my self and my heart to continue down my journey of life, and what a journey it has been so far.
New Year's Eve: the evening of worldwide drunken debauchery, celebration, and Dick Clark's Rockin' Eve (let's be real; we all watch it). One of the biggest quandaries that arises for people come December, is what the New Year's Eve plans will be. Should you go to a fancy club and get bottle service while dressed ridiculously swanky? Should you have a game night with some close friends? Should you get tickets to the hottest event in town? My plans for this year: to a. grab a pizza. b. watch movies. c. watch the ball drop. d. enjoy my Sam Adams Winter Lager. e. go to sleep. I did all of this...with a few added bulletpoints. I just wanted to start the year off happy and smiling...and I did. However, the course of events was a bit different than I had planned. The interesting thing: I was excited to celebrate the New Year by myself; everyone else felt bad for me. If I was happy about it and ok with it, then why should you feel bad for me? I don't feel bad. I had a couple New Years offers, and I opted to not partake; it's ok. I think many people are afraid to be by themselves paralleling being by yourself to being lonely. I'm far from lonely right now...and being alone doesn't mean being lonely. I've felt lonely. I've felt alone. I've felt lonely and alone. However, I was not that. Here was my New Years Eve:
I went to the movie theatre to see "Blue Valentine" because I love Michelle Williams. Unfortunately, it was sold out. I saw Rabbithole instead. Great movie, pretty depressing, but excellent performances by the cast. Speaking of lonely, that's what this movie was about...sort of dealing with the loneliness while being in a relationship because of a grievance from the past. I then went home and got a fully loaded pizza from Papa Johns plus their breadsticks. Best decision. For some reason, pineapple on a pizza makes the world so much better. Rob, the roomie, was home, so we chilled and watched tv and caught up for a while. His New Year's plans were beginning to fall through. Julie had called me earlier and told me to come out to Anth's sister's place; I obliged after a while. Throughout the course of the evening my plans fell through, and Rob's friend ended up calling him to go out. I opted to not go to the bar they were going to. I've done the whole pay $100 for a fun New Year's night (and it probably one of my favorite New Years in recent years), but I wasn't about that. So, they left...and shortly came back...and kidnapped me. They took me to the bar with no cover (ahem. I don't pay cover for bars). So, I went. We had a great time...and then it got busier...and busier...and crowded...and busier...You now could not stand without people pushing to get by. Before I could get upset and turn my evening into a bad night, I decided to leave; still in a great mood and having a fun time dancing and meeting people. I left the bar at 11:30 and walked home (it was three blocks away). I was laughing; I was smiling; I was enjoying my evening. I got home, threw on Dick Clark's special (see! you have to watch it), grabbed an apple to bring in the new year with good health, and some loose change for good finances as well. I watched the ball drop, smiled, laughed, got a few phone calls and text messages, and then headed to bed. It was a beautiful, stress free, enjoyable evening. I did everything I wanted to do, and brought in the new year with good energy. Could you ask for anything better? I may have been physically alone, but I was definitely far from being alone. People all over the country were thinking of me and wishing me the best, as I was doing the exact same for them...whether their new year began at 9pm, 10pm, or 11pm my time. Good energy, positive thoughts, and lots of love is the way to start things off. I'm glad I brought in 2011 with a smile and laughs; it'll be a good year.
On another note, similarly related...I worked at Starbucks yesterday. Here, I was able to watch the walk of shame parade throughout the course of the day. Watching these people come in to order their quad espresso drinks or whatever to cure their hangovers, made me so happy I celebrated the way I did, and felt good the next day. Sunglasses on to hide the bags under the eyes or the bloodshot eyes, slow moving and the inability to fully comprehend what's going on, noises being too loud...some of the issues being had. My co-workers and I? We spent the day having an amazing time. We laughed, we sang, we danced, we joked, we worked hard, we enjoyed each others' company...and felt good.
It's amazing when you look back at things and how they unfold. The reason I could not find a job before was because I was meant to end up at the Starbucks. My new found friends aka co-workers are more than I could have ever asked for. Going into Starbucks is not just a job; it's become a fun environment. I enjoy going in and being with people I like and that like me. Yes, it's a busy place to work and there's a lot of work that it entails, but working with energized and motivated people makes it such a great place to go to. Obviously, I don't plan on being here forever, but as a "survival" job for the meantime? I couldn't have asked for anything better. I definitely have some amazing people watching over me who know what they're doing, whether I believe it or not at times. They know what's right...just need to keep the faith.
And now, my coffee cup is drained...I guess that means time to get ready for the day. I wish you all the best in 2011. Send love, and you will receive it.
New Year's Eve: the evening of worldwide drunken debauchery, celebration, and Dick Clark's Rockin' Eve (let's be real; we all watch it). One of the biggest quandaries that arises for people come December, is what the New Year's Eve plans will be. Should you go to a fancy club and get bottle service while dressed ridiculously swanky? Should you have a game night with some close friends? Should you get tickets to the hottest event in town? My plans for this year: to a. grab a pizza. b. watch movies. c. watch the ball drop. d. enjoy my Sam Adams Winter Lager. e. go to sleep. I did all of this...with a few added bulletpoints. I just wanted to start the year off happy and smiling...and I did. However, the course of events was a bit different than I had planned. The interesting thing: I was excited to celebrate the New Year by myself; everyone else felt bad for me. If I was happy about it and ok with it, then why should you feel bad for me? I don't feel bad. I had a couple New Years offers, and I opted to not partake; it's ok. I think many people are afraid to be by themselves paralleling being by yourself to being lonely. I'm far from lonely right now...and being alone doesn't mean being lonely. I've felt lonely. I've felt alone. I've felt lonely and alone. However, I was not that. Here was my New Years Eve:
I went to the movie theatre to see "Blue Valentine" because I love Michelle Williams. Unfortunately, it was sold out. I saw Rabbithole instead. Great movie, pretty depressing, but excellent performances by the cast. Speaking of lonely, that's what this movie was about...sort of dealing with the loneliness while being in a relationship because of a grievance from the past. I then went home and got a fully loaded pizza from Papa Johns plus their breadsticks. Best decision. For some reason, pineapple on a pizza makes the world so much better. Rob, the roomie, was home, so we chilled and watched tv and caught up for a while. His New Year's plans were beginning to fall through. Julie had called me earlier and told me to come out to Anth's sister's place; I obliged after a while. Throughout the course of the evening my plans fell through, and Rob's friend ended up calling him to go out. I opted to not go to the bar they were going to. I've done the whole pay $100 for a fun New Year's night (and it probably one of my favorite New Years in recent years), but I wasn't about that. So, they left...and shortly came back...and kidnapped me. They took me to the bar with no cover (ahem. I don't pay cover for bars). So, I went. We had a great time...and then it got busier...and busier...and crowded...and busier...You now could not stand without people pushing to get by. Before I could get upset and turn my evening into a bad night, I decided to leave; still in a great mood and having a fun time dancing and meeting people. I left the bar at 11:30 and walked home (it was three blocks away). I was laughing; I was smiling; I was enjoying my evening. I got home, threw on Dick Clark's special (see! you have to watch it), grabbed an apple to bring in the new year with good health, and some loose change for good finances as well. I watched the ball drop, smiled, laughed, got a few phone calls and text messages, and then headed to bed. It was a beautiful, stress free, enjoyable evening. I did everything I wanted to do, and brought in the new year with good energy. Could you ask for anything better? I may have been physically alone, but I was definitely far from being alone. People all over the country were thinking of me and wishing me the best, as I was doing the exact same for them...whether their new year began at 9pm, 10pm, or 11pm my time. Good energy, positive thoughts, and lots of love is the way to start things off. I'm glad I brought in 2011 with a smile and laughs; it'll be a good year.
On another note, similarly related...I worked at Starbucks yesterday. Here, I was able to watch the walk of shame parade throughout the course of the day. Watching these people come in to order their quad espresso drinks or whatever to cure their hangovers, made me so happy I celebrated the way I did, and felt good the next day. Sunglasses on to hide the bags under the eyes or the bloodshot eyes, slow moving and the inability to fully comprehend what's going on, noises being too loud...some of the issues being had. My co-workers and I? We spent the day having an amazing time. We laughed, we sang, we danced, we joked, we worked hard, we enjoyed each others' company...and felt good.
It's amazing when you look back at things and how they unfold. The reason I could not find a job before was because I was meant to end up at the Starbucks. My new found friends aka co-workers are more than I could have ever asked for. Going into Starbucks is not just a job; it's become a fun environment. I enjoy going in and being with people I like and that like me. Yes, it's a busy place to work and there's a lot of work that it entails, but working with energized and motivated people makes it such a great place to go to. Obviously, I don't plan on being here forever, but as a "survival" job for the meantime? I couldn't have asked for anything better. I definitely have some amazing people watching over me who know what they're doing, whether I believe it or not at times. They know what's right...just need to keep the faith.
And now, my coffee cup is drained...I guess that means time to get ready for the day. I wish you all the best in 2011. Send love, and you will receive it.
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